Love Your Beasties x
You may or may not be aware of it but most of the people in your life are giving you a subtle (or not so subtle) message that it's only OK for you to feel
If you're unhappy about something and raging with anger your parents might say "go and sit on the naughty step until you can calm down and can be a nice girl again!"
So mostly you'll do as you're told and gather up all your angry feelings as if they were dangerous beasts escaped from the zoo. Then you'll tuck them under your ribs, out of sight, and turn yourselves into the perfect
your parents want you to be, the girl they not afraid of, the one they know how to love.
It's sometimes the same if you're feeling sad, they'll say "Cheer up!" "Smile!" "Let's make it better!"
Teachers are doing it too. And the media. They're all going on and on about being
Your teachers will shower
onto the girls that smile the most, the ones that are perfect, that excel at a million subjects and get top marks A*********'s all the time.
You might want to
on them but your teachers will love them because they make their job much easier.
THE PROBLEM IS...
...when we only get to express this angelic side of ourselves there are a whole bunch of other quite wonderful feelings full of texture and richness that we never get to feel or share. We just feel guilty for feeling them and attempt to hide them even more.
We never get to experience
of our feelings which are wonderful and totally
ANGER, RAGE, JEALOUSY, HATRED and SADNESS are NORMAL
And the reason everyone denies them and is so very scared of them is because when you trap them inside and tuck them under your ribs for too long they really do start behaving like wild beasts. They can't just sit there quietly so they start coming out sideways in things like
SARCASM, QUEIT DIGS, SNIDE REMARKS, BANGING DOORS, SLAMMING CUPS, EVIL LOOKS
and people who go on to do real harm in the world like
MURDERERS, AXE WELDING MANIACS, BULLIES, RAPISTS, ABUSERS ETC
do it BECAUSE keeping all the beasts quiet becomes too much, BECAUSE they've not been taught how to relate with these feelings, they've not been told that they're normal, no one's ever seen them feel angry and seen beauty in its expression. No one's ever seen their tears and just gently held them. No one's ever looked at their D grade and said
YOU'RE TOTALLY PERFECT AND I LOVE YOU JUST AS YOU ARE
I need to get one thing clear though...
It's NEVER NOT EVER OK to dump your feelings on others, to take them out on others, or to hurt someone else in ANY way WHATSOEVER.
But it IS OK however to CELEBRATE your feelings and to love them because they're yours.
And if you start to do this I promise you'll find the relationships in your life will feel closer, richer and deeper.
Imagine the freedom and closeness you'd feel if you could say to your Bestie, "I'm really jealous of you," just because it's the truth, without her or you freaking out that you've done something wrong. Or if you could say to your annoying brother or sister "I really hate you" without hitting them and with you both knowing that your hate is as much of a wonderful gift as your love. Imagine the freedom and closeness you'd feel if you could just be angry and rage like a toddler on the floor sometimes with your mum next to you appreciating the power and strength of the emotion flowing through your body just like a wave crashing down on the shore.
So how would it be to let your beasties out of their cage
and welcome them into your world?
You have encapsulated so well what we are all encouraged/made to do from tiny children and for the rest of our lives. It's not a healthy or happy way to live to sit on your feelings and only show the 'pretty'ones.
Thank you. xx